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Today, I answer the important hypothetical questions about television. If you disagree, good. There are no incorrect answers. Remember, if you ask a question, you are allowing the possibility of answers you dislike.

“South Park or Beavis & Butt-Head?” Beavis and Butt-Head.
“Simpsons or Family Guy?” Simpsons.
“King of the Hill or Futurama?” King of the Hill.
“Ginger or Mary Ann?” Ginger.
“Joel or Mike?” Joel.
“Which Seinfeld character are you?” Newman.
“Hanna Barbera, Warner Brothers, or Disney?” Warner Brothers.
“Peter Jennings, Dan Rather, or Tom Brokaw?” Tom Brokaw.
“Letterman, Leno, Kimmel, or Conan?” Letterman.
“Colbert or Stewart?” Stewart.
“Ferguson, Kilborn, Snyder, Daly, or Fallon?” Kilborn.
“CBS, NBC, ABC, or FOX?” FOX.
“CNN, MSNBC, HLN, or FOX News?” MSNBC.
“TBS or Comedy Central?” Comedy Central.
“FX, AMC, USA, or TNT?” FX.
“Sitcoms: CBS, NBC, ABC, or FOX?” FOX.
“Favorite Muppet?” Cookie Monster.
“Favorite SNL Character?” Brian Fellows.
“Favorite TV Chef?” The Galloping Gourmet.

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